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COCK UP Sex Toy Story Runs In The Sun

Wednesday June 7, 2017

COCK UP Sex Toy Story Runs In The Sun

A local press story about x-rated souvenirs for sale in shops on Lanzarote is now titillating readers of The Sun in the UK. With the ridiculous red top claiming that it´s randy British tourists who are to blame for this outrage.

The Sun has picked up on a story in the local press here about four local shops selling phallic shaped bottle openers - the sort of mass produced tat that tourists can buy the world over from Bali to Puerto del Carmen.

According to The Sun, outraged politicians here on Lanzarote from the Nuevo Canarias party have 'declared war´ on these shops, as they have been publicly displaying and selling these x-rated items in full view of children.

Nuevo Canarias representatives feel that this denigrates the island´s hard won image as a more upmarket holiday destination - as opposed to the Lanza-grotty image of old. And the local police appear to agree with them, as they have apparently reported these shops for infractions against laws designed to protect minors.

However in a typically tortured twist, the Sun´s salacious headline states that politician´s here are in fact planning a´clampdown on randy Brits´!  

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